I called Phil and he said she’s gonna get the kids. What’s the point of having a motherfucking lawyer I’m paying millions of dollars if he can’t get the one thing I want? He’s so goddamn pompous, “we’re paying less money than we thought possible, I’ve got my best men.” I don’t care if she gets the Florida house so long as she doesn’t get my kids. My goddamn kids. No, no fuck Meredith this isn’t your fault. We’ve done nothing wrong. It’s just my idiot of a lawyer and my vengeful bitch of a wife. She’s hired some shark you know? Trying to make me out like some absentee father fucking the coworker and all that. She’s just doing this to spite us. She’ never cared about them. Sure, she was with them more but I was supporting this family. I would wake up at 3 am to take the metro into the city, get there as soon as the market opened, I’d come home late, exhausted, but I’d still have time for the. And where was she? In the basement doing some fucking kettle bell workout or making some low cal meal. I can’t let them live with said to go, got a job where I thought I could make the most money, did everything I was supposed to be for no reason beside that. I was working for nothing, no reward. Then Jonathan was born and suddenly there’s this other creature who’s like dependent on you and has all of this potential and whatever. And like he was like this wild little kid, always throwing things and shit. And before then it would’ve pissed me off and I’d have thought, how can I focus like this? But instead it was endearing. I had something in my life that wasn’t like work. And someone who I was always there for. It was the same with Ellie. She was completely monster of a baby as well, that’s from HER side I can assure you, but I liked it. They didn’t do what they were supposed to and I think I respected them for that. You know they’re in middle school now, so they’re not, throwing crayons or whatever but still, there’s this spark in them. I see it in you too, your jacket never matched your shirt and for some reason it reminded me of them, I guess, but it’s different. I can’t lose that spark in my life. I can’t go back to just, mindless, endless, work. The thing is there is a way out. That’s what I’m trying to say here. There’s only on thing that Phil said could make the court give me join custody. I don’t know how to tell you but the fact is the courts aren’t gonna let the kids be raised by a mistress. It’s you or them Meredith. And I hate her for making me choose but I can’t turn this down. I love you, you know I do. But I love my kids more. So we need to end this. Don’t cry or anything okay? It’s not about you. But I’ve got to do something right for a change.